My office has a hoarding problem. A big one. It’s truly panic inducing.

I’ve mentioned we’re in a transition as we close one of our offices and move some of those guys to the corporate office where I am. We also have a shift in leadership, and so there has been several shifts of who is in what office. We’ve also been without an office manager for several months; myself and the receptionist have both taken on parts of that job unfortunately.

As the guys have been like hermit crabs switching offices, there have been several pieces of furniture or technology (or honestly just down right garbage) left in the hallway. Yes. They leave it in the hallway. I’d had enough. I started at the end that was bothering me the most and made my way through the rest of the upstairs corridor of Project Managers.

Things I found:

Old printers / fax machines – Because 1 fax machine is not enough. We need another to receive spam on. Which, my God, if your company is sending fax spam I have imagine your company is STRUGGLING.
A typewriter – WHY????? When was the last time we used this? We didn’t Office Space this thing the second we got computers?
A limitless supply of cookie tins – I too love the treats we get from salesmen, but we don’t need to keep the tins. We had 20+. They’re now in the garbage. Where they belong.
Photo paper – When was the last time you actually printed a picture. WHEN? It wasn’t just a little bit of photo paper, it was PILES of it.
A Rolodex – Stop it, just get out. You know why people don’t use these any more? Because we have cell phones. And a brain.
Floppy disks – Why weren’t these in storage with the rest of the files we keep there? My computer doesn’t even have the ability to use a floppy anymore. Gross.
Things completely unidentifiable – I’m calling the police.

2018-06-22 12.55.07

The floppy disks were in one of those old CD stacker things. My mind was blown. It was like looking at my childhood… but in a horror movie scene.

I can no longer tell what year it is. Is there complimentary hair spray in the ladies bathroom? How big are my shoulder pads? Do I need to cover my typewriter at the end of the day? Am I wearing panty hose? Am I, a woman, even allowed to work?!?

IS IT EVEN 2018?!?!?! Send help.

– MJ

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